The Day I Almost Committed A Felony Read online

into the emergency bay.

  “I found him at Carleton Park,” I explained in a rush as people came running out. “Please, help him. I can't believe this is happening!”

  I began to sob into my hands, at first in an attempt to hide my insincerity, but suddenly real tears started to pour. Maybe it was the stress or the horror of the whole night, I'm not sure. Whatever the reason, it’d worked just as well as a lucky rabbit’s foot. Before I knew it, a big-chested nurse was consoling me, clucking at me like a mother hen at her errant chick.

  I’d watched enough television and movies to know the basic routine. I knew a cop would come to take my statement. Of course, I would tell him everything up until the part where I smashed a rock to Jon’s cranium and snuffed out his miserable life. Seemed simple enough. If only I could work up a few more tears.

  My thoughts flashed to the bloody rock, sticky with gross stuff (I don’t even want to know what) and strands of hair. It was still sitting in the trunk of my mom’s car. The thought made me more than a little uneasy.

  A nurse walked toward me with a stern expression. I braced myself for the news that Jon was dead. I mentally prepared myself to look shocked and horrified, perhaps even a little heart-broken. When the nurse reached me, her face erupted into an unexpected smile.

  “I have some good news. You're friend is alive.”

  What! My mouth dropped open and I could hardly breathe. He was alive. Oh God, I was going to prison now for sure. As soon as he was able, that rotten jerk would sing like a bird. My life was ruined. Goodbye cheer squad. Goodbye college. Hello orange jumpsuit, bad hair and starchy foods.

  “He's alive?” I managed to whisper.

  The nurse took my response as one of relief, instead of the terror that I felt. Maybe I should’ve gone into theater. Apparently, I was pretty good at lying through my teeth.

  “You saved his life.” The nurse's eyes were full of admiration. “I'm sure that he's going to say you are his guardian angel. It was blind luck to have found him so quickly. If he had lost anymore blood...” she tsked at the possibilities.

  The little tremors that had been making my knees quake grew to the point where I had to sit or fall down. Could you say nightmare? I had no doubt Jon would be calling me names but guardian angel probably wouldn’t be among them; more like psycho bitch would be more like it.

  I opened his door with a frozen expression. Jon was lying partially propped up with a huge white bandage on his head. He looked at me with a blank stare as I came into the room. When he managed a smile, I almost fainted.

  “Hi. I'm so glad that you came to see me,” he said, his voice weak.

  “Really?” What a sick bastard! He was toying with me. I should have driven around the block a few times before bringing him in.

  “I wanted to thank you for bringing me to the hospital. If it hadn't been for you...” His eyes began to mist over at the thought of his brush with death. “Do you think you could call my parents for me? I don’t seem to have my cell with me.”

  He wanted me to call his parents? Not sure I could do that. Surely that was grounds for a lightening strike to the nob. Before I could say anything, the doctor came in.

  “You are one lucky guy,” he admonished. “If it hadn't been for this friend of yours, I can't say that I would have been able to give such news.”

  Just as the doctor finished talking, there was a polite rap on the door and an officer came into the room. “If it's all right, I’d like to take your statement,” he said, taking out a small notepad.

  The room had begun to tilt. Panic paralyzed me. I was going to prison!

  A puzzled look came over Jon, and he gave the same blank stare to the officer that he gave me when I came in to the room.

  “I don't remember.”

  The air whooshed out of my lungs. The officer and I both looked to the doctor. I forced myself to appear concerned when in fact I was dancing like a crazy person in my head.

  “It is possible that you have some short-term memory loss, which could have happened when you were attacked or when you hit the ground. Unfortunately, there is nothing I can do to restore that. Only time will tell.”

  I tried not to let my relief show. I did my best to look disappointed.

  “So, are you saying that whoever did this, could get away with it?” I asked, sounding as angry as I could manage without sounding like a bad actress in an equally bad movie.

  “Well, unfortunately, it doesn't look good if our key witness has lost his memory of the event. Unless we find the weapon, that is,” the officer ventured.

  Again, my thoughts jumped to the incriminating rock lying in the trunk. Criminy, I needed to ditch the evidence.

  “Here's my card. Let me know if you remember anything…” the officer handed Jon the card and then shook my hand before leaving. I prayed that my hand was steady. The doctor followed the officer, and suddenly, there was just Jon and I. Had he really lost his memory?

  “You honestly don't remember, huh?” I asked.

  He shook his head. “I remember my name and where I was born, stuff like that. But, I can’t seem to remember anything after the first kick-off at the football game. I don’t even know what I was doing at that park. It's like someone erased that part of my memory.”

  “I guess everyone is getting a second chance tonight,” I said cryptically. In my mind’s eye I saw Mareka, only a couple doors down from Jon’s room. “Here’s the thing…sorry about the bad timing and all but Mareka wants to break up with you.”

  “Why?” he asked, grimacing. “Never mind. I get it.”

  Smart boy. He might not remember the incident that landed him in that hospital bed but he knew he was no angel. I turned to leave — no, make that skip — from the room when his voice at my back stopped me.

  “Tell her I’m sorry,” he said. “I should’ve treated her better.”

  “You got that right,” I muttered and hustled out of there, eager to get away from him and put some distance between myself and the whole felonious affair. I smiled and left the hospital.

  Mareka didn't press charges because he didn’t even remember what he had done to her and he seemed truly sorry, but she agreed with me and decided it was best to stop seeing him. Surprisingly, Jon still hasn't regained his memory of that night, and for some reason, he seems a lot nicer.

  Of course, I have my own theory. Maybe his memory is just fine. Sometimes I wonder, but I’m not worried. I dropped the rock into the nearest

  lake, detailed the car and then convinced my mom it was time for an upgrade. She enjoys driving her new car, and I enjoy having my best friend back.

  I suppose if he did happen to remember and tried to go to the police I might have a problem but honestly, who would believe him? I saved his life. If it weren’t for me, his sorry life would’ve dribbled out in the dirt. I think deep down, he knows this. Seems a taste of mortality can do wonders for Douchey McDouchey types.

  Now, it’s back to real life, filled with cramming for tests, trying out for the cheer squad, finding a date for the prom and of course, playing the occasional mall rat.

  But one thing is for sure, I am going to college a hero, and, let me tell you, that will look pretty damn awesome on my application.

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